Advice, Essays, and other bits of wisdom

How to make the right decision

What decision are you grappling with right now? Maybe it's something seemingly insignificant. Vanilla or chocolate? 😉 Or maybe it's something that, when you think about it, feels intractable....

You get to decide

A client asked me if I still need to work on my relationship with my mother. She wondered if I feel good about it all the time. I laughed out loud. Yes I still work on it and no I don't feel good...

There is no failure; there is only practice

You are built to feel love. It's your birthright. And there's a part of you that wants to feel love when you think about your mother. Even if she was a terrible person. Even if she did terrible...

“Wishing she would die is eating my soul”

Question from a reader in response to Crying out for Mother...again: "Hi Karen, I don’t even know what I’m feeling except that I know that you get it. Thank you for expressing what I cannot say and...



“If there was A Nobel Prize for women helping/supporting women, you’d be the recipient. I love you.” ~ C.H.

“I have benefitted so much from your work and I especially used Difficult Mothers, Adult Daughters to help me reframe my relationship with my own difficult mother. In a nutshell, I have learned to give her the unconditional love she always denied me and to allow her to be whoever she is. So much wisdom in that book! I was underlining on almost every page.” ~ J.M.

Karen, I find your blog posts so inspiring. I now have a fabulous relationship with my mum but it takes concentrated work each day to keep it being good. I am so glad I found you and your writing.” ~ S.H.

“As always, your writing hits the very thing I needed to see / hear / read, just when I need it! Even when, and especially when, people see your mother as “super human” – someone to be admired and followed – we can have different relationships with them. While I don’t comment often, know that I read everything I receive from you – and I get value from it all!” ~ D.D.

“Believe it or not your book was so helpful even though I got a hold of it only 6 months before my mother died. Your weekly Love Notes continue to be helpful and I recommend your book to anyone with a deceased mother who feels like they are still being controlled from the grave.” ~ J.Z.

“The advice you provide in your weekly Love Notes What is so skillful. powerful, loving, and boundaried. Thank you for modeling how to show up with wisdom instead of defensively. I feel a little safer in the world.” ~ L.R.

Karen, you are awesome. I love having your emails in my inbox giving me added support with loving my elderly mum.” ~ H.S.

“I am so thankful for discovering you and you never fail to surprise me with how on point and how relatable your words and messages are.” ~ K.S.

“Thank you so much for this! This couldn’t have come at a better time. You are so intuitive!” ~ K.B.

“Thank you once again for seeing so much of the truth of who I am and who I want to be, and writing it so beautifully!” ~ B.C.


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