Advice, Essays, and other bits of wisdom

THIS is where the pattern gets interrupted

You've come here to work on the relationship you have with your mother. To establish healthy, mature boundaries. Inevitably, you will also work on the relationship you have with yourself. And the...

the most life-affirming thing you’ve ever done

It’s not easy to reconcile and heal your relationship with your mother if it’s been a source of suffering. It’s an ongoing process that can include the cycling of intense emotion (fear, rage, grief)...

The moment that set me free

I remember the day so clearly. I had marched myself down to Ocean Beach Park, a few blocks from our old house in New London, and was HURLING rocks into the water. It was a fury like no other. White!...

Why you can’t logic your way out of fear

What will they think?" "I don't want her to think ______." "I'm afraid of being criticized." Not every woman who has these fears has a difficult relationship with her mother, but women who DO seem...



“If there was A Nobel Prize for women helping/supporting women, you’d be the recipient. I love you.” ~ C.H.

“I have benefitted so much from your work and I especially used Difficult Mothers, Adult Daughters to help me reframe my relationship with my own difficult mother. In a nutshell, I have learned to give her the unconditional love she always denied me and to allow her to be whoever she is. So much wisdom in that book! I was underlining on almost every page.” ~ J.M.

Karen, I find your blog posts so inspiring. I now have a fabulous relationship with my mum but it takes concentrated work each day to keep it being good. I am so glad I found you and your writing.” ~ S.H.

“As always, your writing hits the very thing I needed to see / hear / read, just when I need it! Even when, and especially when, people see your mother as “super human” – someone to be admired and followed – we can have different relationships with them. While I don’t comment often, know that I read everything I receive from you – and I get value from it all!” ~ D.D.

“Believe it or not your book was so helpful even though I got a hold of it only 6 months before my mother died. Your weekly Love Notes continue to be helpful and I recommend your book to anyone with a deceased mother who feels like they are still being controlled from the grave.” ~ J.Z.

“The advice you provide in your weekly Love Notes What is so skillful. powerful, loving, and boundaried. Thank you for modeling how to show up with wisdom instead of defensively. I feel a little safer in the world.” ~ L.R.

Karen, you are awesome. I love having your emails in my inbox giving me added support with loving my elderly mum.” ~ H.S.

“I am so thankful for discovering you and you never fail to surprise me with how on point and how relatable your words and messages are.” ~ K.S.

“Thank you so much for this! This couldn’t have come at a better time. You are so intuitive!” ~ K.B.

“Thank you once again for seeing so much of the truth of who I am and who I want to be, and writing it so beautifully!” ~ B.C.


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